Surviving Holiday Grief: How to Cope When the Season Doesn’t Feel Merry

For many, the holidays highlight joy, celebration, and togetherness.But for those who are grieving a loved one, the season can feel like a spotlight on what — or who — is missing.

If this time of year feels heavy, here are supportive strategies to help you move through the season at your own pace.

1. Acknowledge That This Season May Feel Different

Grief doesn’t take breaks for the holidays. Instead of forcing yourself to “be jolly,” practice gentle acceptance for whatever emotions show up — sadness, anger, numbness, or even moments of joy.

2. Choose the Traditions You Can Handle

You don’t have to participate in everything. Circle the traditions that feel comforting, and release the ones that feel overwhelming or painful this year.

3. Include Your Loved One in a New Way

Many people find healing in honoring the person they lost. Consider small acts like:

• Lighting a candle

• Cooking their favorite dish

• Sharing stories

• Making a memory ornament

Rituals can help transform pain into connection.

4. Allow Yourself to Feel Joy Without Guilt

Laughing or celebrating doesn’t mean you’ve stopped grieving. It means you’re human — capable of holding multiple emotions at once.

5. Ask for Help When You Need It

Grief is heavy. You deserve support. A therapist can help you process complicated emotions, reduce guilt, and navigate grief waves with more grounding and compassion.

If you’re grieving this season, you don’t have to do it alone. SCCS offers compassionate, culturally responsive support to help you move toward healing at your own pace. Contact our team at SCCS: www.sccs-va.org or 757-319-5174 .   We are here to help you manage stress, reclaim joy, and move through the holidays with confidence and calm.