It’s Okay Not to Feel Merry: How to Navigate Emotional Overwhelm During Christmas

The Christmas season brings lights, music, and celebration — but it can also bring pressure, comparison, loneliness, and emotional overload. If you’re finding it hard to “feel merry,” you’re not alone. Many people struggle quietly this time of year, even while surrounded by festivities.

Here are compassionate reminders and coping strategies for anyone who feels emotionally overwhelmed during Christmas.

1. Give Yourself Permission to Feel What You Feel

You don’t have to force joy. You don’t have to put on a cheerful mask. Your emotions are valid — even if they don’t match the season.

2. Create a Calm Holiday Environment

If crowds, noise, or too many events feel overwhelming, simplify your holiday:

• Choose fewer gatherings

• Stay home when needed

• Create quieter, meaningful moments

• Light a candle, play calming music, breathe

Your peace matters more than any tradition or expectation.

3. Recognize the Signs of Holiday Burnout

Emotional burnout often looks like:

• Irritability

• Feeling numb or disconnected

• Trouble sleeping

• Lack of motivation

• Withdrawing from others

If this resonates, it may be time to slow down and recharge.

4. Limit Comparison — Especially Online

Perfect Christmas photos don’t reflect real life. Social media highlights holiday “best moments,” not the struggles behind them. Give yourself space from comparison triggers.

5. Reach Out for Support

Talking to a therapist can help you explore seasonal depression, anxiety, grief, loneliness, and family dynamics. Support is available — especially during emotionally heavy seasons.

At SCCS, our clinicians are ready to help you move through the holidays with compassion and grounding, one step at a time. Reach out to our team at SCCS: www.sccs-va.org or 757-319-5174 .   We are here to help you manage stress, reclaim joy, and move through the holidays with confidence and calm.